Joy...the world didn't give it and the world can't take it away..REALLY?

I was listening to Christian radio today while running some errands when a song came on. I don't remember what song it was or even the artist singing. What I concentrated on were these words; "The world didn't give it and the world can't take it away" I remember thinking; "Oh yes it can!" Realistically, it can, only if we let it. We would have to lay our joy down. And with it the promise of Jesus, since He is the giver of joy. Jesus lives inside every believer. All we have to do is CHOOSE joy. I know how hard it is to work in this world. To be pulled in every direction. To be surrounded by angry joyless people. That can get too a person after a while. One can start to feel like they are standing under the same gray cloud of depression. This past year and the beginning of this one have been a struggle for me. I have felt the pangs of  a joyless walk. I have struggled with anger and impatience more over these past months then in my entire lifetime. I do not know the reason for these emotions to rear their ugly head in this time of my life, but they are here. I know that all I have to do is call on Jesus and He will help me. I just have to stop, take a deep breath and dig a little deeper and those fruits...you know the one's we learned in Sunday school; Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faith, gentleness, and self-control. Although, I know this, I don't do it. Why do we always run away from something so simple. Is feeling my rage and anger enjoyable? Are the nasty worlds that come from my lips edifying to anyone? The answer to these questions of course is "No"! I would much rather feel peace. I would much rather my words be healing to others. To tell you the truth I would really like to enjoy the fruits that gentleness will bring. I don't know why I am writing on the subject of "A Joyless Walk" Maybe someone else is struggling with this as well. I know that it is a subject near and dear to my own heart. "Write what you know." They say, whoever they are. Well, I know joy...but I am becoming way more familiar with anger. So, if your reading this, pray for me...if you need prayer let me know and I will pray for you. My question for You Lord, is this, Will You help me to know Joy again? Will You Father, help me to cultivate the fruits of love in me again? Gentleness...I sure miss you my dear ol' friend, you can come knock on my door any time!

the Truth in Love,
Heidi Shepherd