All Things New

    Last week I helped my mom set up a blog. Today I am over here again helping her become more familiar with the internet, facebook and her blog. My parents having internet is a "new thing". This is yet another reminder of where I am on this journey with God. He has been whispering "I am doing a new thing" into my heart for a week now, concerning my life. 

     Slowly God is removing anything and everything of my old life. Sometimes I forget that He is doing this so when a connection is abruptly severed or a door closes I am overcome with emotion. When I have settled myself down and can hear Him again He holds me close and says; "See, I am doing a new thing." Soon there will be nothing left that links me to my old life except my last name.

      I know a lot of women change their last name after they have gone through divorce. My lawyer asked me if I would be doing this. I hadn't thought of it before, but knew my answer instantly. No. My last name although, it is tied to him is mine now. I wore this title for more than twenty years. I do not think of it as his anymore. I think of it as ours. It is my boy's name. It is my writing name. It is me. 

     My last name does not cause me anger, resentment or sadness. I actually take pride in my last name. So much of my accomplishments are under this name. I don't think of my marriage as a failure. I did everything according to the Word of God concerning our marriage. I know in my heart that my opening the door and letting him go was also God's will for my life. I need no validation from others on this. I stayed in a marriage that was doomed from the beginning longer than any other Christian woman could have. That is something that I am proud of. 

     Saying goodbye to the old life in most cases is easy. The healing from all the mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical abuse is hard. We all feel the effects of that. This new thing God is doing is gOOd. I am embracing it. 

     To start over one must usually start from a clean canvass, new paint and new paintbrushes. This of course will cause some dismay and hesitation because every painter knows that old paint brushes are better. The artist has worked them into the exact shape and softness or firmness, giving them the best glide and swipe. Knowing just how each and every stroke will turn out. In fact if mistakenly grabbing the wrong paintbrush the painter knows immediately by the first stroke. 

     So, here I am standing before a new canvass, new paint even, none of the old standby colors to rely on, and new paintbrushes. I am all ready, the world is waiting. Oh, the things...the wonderful, marvelous creations one could create. Yes, God is doing a new thing...and I am ready...so very ready!

the TRUTH in LOVE, Heidi L. Shepherd